After Koji Uehara finished off a 1-2-3 eighth inning last night, he stampeded his way through the Red Sox dugout with his delightful KOJI HIGH FIVES routine. Only Shane Victorino was sitting up on the rail, minding his own business. That's when Uehara uncorked a vicious arm slap leading to the best facial expression ever. I love the mix of horror and glee on Vic's face. It's as though his arm hurts like a bitch, but he still can't help but love that crazy, messed up Japanese dude. Enjoy:
Koji embodies all that is good about the 2013 Red Sox. After the lifeless group of underachievers playing here a year ago, Koji is a breath of wild, exciting fresh air. It's as if last year we (as in all of Red Sox Nation) were dating a woman who had the looks of a 9, but was heartless and cold and shallow and no fun whatsoever to be around. This year, RSN gets to date a solid 7, but she is funny and smart and vivacious. And we are so much better off for it.
Also, I have ripped the NESN player bio segment many times so far this season, but I loved Koji's bio last night. For anybody who may have missed it, Uehara's favorite food is....wait for it...a McDonald's Filet 'o Fish! Seriously?!?!?! Has anybody ever had a Filet 'o Fish? It tastes like a straight up patty of hot garbage covered in cheap cheese and watery tartar sauce. But somehow it fits Koji perfectly. I imagine him reaching out of his car to give the drive thru employee a hand-killing high five, then tearing into his filet 'o fish with enormous bites, cackling maniacally, and peeling out of the McDonald's with cheap fish burger flying all over his face and car. I love the guy.